A Spanish Lesson. From Me. Because I Totally Speak Spanish.

...not infrequently, women(s) come up to me and say, "You know what?  If I lean way back and squint, and pack a handful of dirt into each of my ears, you look and sound exactly like Antonio Banderas.  Do you speak Spanish?" I respond by saying, "Si (which is Spanish for no) se puede (which is Spanish for but I do know several incredibly romantic Spanish lines)".  Today, Creek fans, I'm going to use my amazing sketchbook sketches to teach you several of Creek's Incredibly Romantic Spanish Lines.  Ready?  No?  Too bad, we're going anyway.

Here's one you can use if you're trying to get at a girl who likes you but doesn't know it so you have to keep pestering her until she comes to her senses:

I'll zoom out so you can see the entire image (this one stretches across two sketchbook pages and I had to tear it out and chop it down to fit it on my scanner):

Here's a line you can use if the girl you want is really into corny Spanish language soap operas:

Enunciation is key.  You want to try and sound as much like Vicente Fox as possible.

Here's one you can say loudly to your friends as she passes by, and when she hears it she'll immediately swoon and fall directly into your ever-ready arms:

These are all extremely powerful, fail-proof lines and I'd warn you against using them casually, but I can see that some of you are already heading out the door to find the nearest Maria or Gabriella or Alessandra.  Just don't come crying to me when you find yourself drowning in a sea of Spanish speaking women(s).

[and if anyone looks at these and tells you, "Wow,  none of these sentences are correct.  His grammar is terrible and he doesn't know how to spell.  Some of these aren't even words...", it's because he(or she) cannot speak Spanish.]

For those of you who are still here, enjoy these details from the first sketch:

Adios.

[cheers]