Monday, December 15, 2014

Drive, That One Movie Where Ryan Gosling Is Some Kind Of Killer Stuntman

Here's an email I received recently from a fan:

Mr.  Creekmore, I was at the library the other day and I rented a Carey Mulligan movie called "Drive".  I liked it.  In fact, I'd like to decorate my home with a poster of the movie, but I don't want to go through the trouble of ordering a poster online.  What should I do?

This is an  easy fix.  Just make your own poster.

First
  Watch the film again and figure out what exactly it is about the movie (a strange genre flick with an 80's aesthetic and a Silent Loner protagonist) that makes you like it.



Second
After you've failed to complete the first step, decide to just do an illustraty re-creation of that one scene in the elevator.

Third
Get a roll of paper.



Fourth
Get some pencils.



Fifth
Get some brushes.



Sixth
You know what, just get a bunch of supplies.  You never know.



Seventh
Throw all of that stuff in a corner and then just forget about it for a few months.



Eighth
Look at all that stuff in the corner and then forget about it again for a few more months.



Ninth
Enough already.  Just draw the drawing.



Tenth
Finish the drawing.



Eleventh
Scan the drawing.



Twelfth
Go to the store and trade in your right leg for a copy of Photoshop.



Thirteenth
Spend several hours just trying to figure out how to choose a font.



Fourteenth
Ultimately decide on the simplest possible design because you're lousy at Photoshop.

Fifteenth
Put the image on a thumb drive and take it down to your local copy shop and have them print off a nice poster sized copy for you.



Sixteenth
Viola!  Now you have your very own Drive poster without having to go through the hassle of going online and ordering one.





...or, if you don't want to do this either, you can make friends with an artist who likes the exact same things you do and then wait for him to do a poster of the specific movie you like and then just ask him for a copy.  Either way.

Cheers.


2 comments:

  1. Creek, it's about time someone stepped up and filled the void Bob Ross left almost 20 years ago! Your simple step by step process couldn't have been any simpler or painless, all you need now is a killer afro!

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    Replies
    1. ...bring back the afro..? That's crazy talk... [looks in mirror, scratches chin] ...or is it?

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