Monday, May 4, 2015

The Book Of Jonah

I was recently asked to do an illustration of the prophet Jonah.  Here's what I came up with:







Jonah is one of my favorite short stories ever.  It's ancient and it's brusque and the titular Jonah is a churlish, irascible kind of character who doesn't seem to have learned anything by the time the narrative reaches its abrupt conclusion.  You've read it before, yes?  The Book of Jonah?  No?  Well, it goes like this...








...except that Jonah wasn't going to Ninevah.  He jumps into a boat and heads the other way, hoping to get away from God.  But God gets upset and brings down a raging storm on Jonah and everyone who happens to be in the boat with him, and everyone who happens to be in the boat with him is scared to death.





They throw all of their cargo overboard but the ship is still in peril.  Finally Jonah tells them that he is running from God.



When they ask him what they should do, Jonah tells them to throw him overboard, which is a jerk request.  Why doesn't he just jump overboard?  They have to throw him out?  Like a bunch of killers?  Terrible.

Anyway, they of course don't want to throw a man into a stormy sea so they ignore his suggestion and try to paddle back to land, which doesn't work because the storm is going at full force.



So after they finally give in and toss Jonah out of the boat, the sea immediately becomes quiet, as if Jesus just told it to calm down.  The guys in the boat are all astounded and offer sacrifices to God.



...so it turns out that God gains a few more followers through Jonah's shenanigans.  Meanwhile, God has a large fish swim up and swallow Jonah to keep him from drowning.  Jonah sits inside of that fish for 3 full days, praying the whole time.



Eventually God tells the fish to spit Jonah out, so it swims up to some land and vomits him out onto a beach.









I like to imagine how crazy that must've looked to anyone who happened to be standing around.



As soon as Jonah gets out, he heads off to Ninevah and starts preaching about how God is upset at them and is going to kill them all.  I mean, here's this guy, just came out of a fish, probably has seaweed and coral all in his beard, probably smells horrible, and he's walking around screaming about the wrath of God.  And apparently he's pretty convincing because the whole city believes him, even the king.



The Ninevites all decide to start not being wicked, so God changes his mind and decides to not destroy Ninevah.  And here's the best part:  Jonah is UPSET that God isn't going to destroy the city!



Jonah is so upset that he asks God to just kill him and then he stalks out of the city, like some petulant child, and sits off by himself.



God grows a nice bush for Jonah, miraculously, to give him some shade from the sun...



...and then he takes it away and blows some hot wind at him...



...at which point Jonah gets even saltier, prompting God to ask him...



And Jonah gives him the most smart-alecky answer anyone ever gives God in the entire Bible:



Which is remarkable.  Usually, Biblically speaking, whenever God says anything to anyone, that person is so scared all he can do is say:







But not Jonah...



Apparently God used his inside voice when he talked to Jonah.

I get the feeling that God found Jonah amusing somehow, that God enjoyed poking him and trying to get him to see things differently, like in the last few lines of the story when he points out how Jonah is more concerned about the life of a bush than he is about the inhabitants of an entire city.

It's a good story, a funny story.  Read it sometime.  Maybe you'll like it as much as I do.



Cheers.

3 comments:

  1. Instant Creek Classic!! I love how you fill in the gaps of the story with the illustrations, i.e., the telephone - and even allegedly smart phones - are really much older than we think, every prophet worth his salt had to have one, the reason the fish was able to swallow Jonah was not just because it was a really big fish, but because it was a really big Chinese dragon fish, and finally the Ninevites weren't just going to be punished for your ordinary garden variety idolatry, it was actually much worse than that - the worship of a bird with an absurdly long neck that can't even fly - Struthio, the ostrich god!

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    1. Wow, I didn't think anyone would notice ol' Struthio...

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  2. Hi
    I was sent your illustration of Jonah thrown up on the beach (unattribited) a couple of years ago in response to a series of monologues and lectures I was doing on the story, and in the midst of lockdown I have been asked to put them on video. I was wanting to use your illustration as a title card but thought I would google its origins and check with you first. I would of course put in whatever attribution you wished. The videos aren't monetized (they're not that good)... love your commentary and may well cite it in future lectures

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